Day 96...I've got it all!

Dear Sadie,
You know those verses, "I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."  Philippians 4:11-12
Let me first say that my "in want" is no where near the devastating times Paul faced.  It feels silly to even apply these verses when I cannot say I have or will ever have gone through what he went through.  Despite that, I still know God wants me to learn this  "secret of being content."  Perhaps to prepare me for more?  Maybe to show me what I really want or need is not what I am really wanting at the moment?  Whatever the case may be, I am starting to get at it.

I am not sure exactly how it is happening, my gently uncovering of this secret, for I don't think I could speak about it, teach it, or even share it even if I tried.  I struggle even to write you about it.  I just want you to know that there is a secret of contentment that comes from a knowing Paul talks about, "I know what it is to be in need...and...have plenty."  He's been there!  He's lived both sides of the coin.  It's a lesson you learn by being there.  So even though my state is nothing like that of Paul's, I can still relate because I am human, and we go through places and times similar though different.  How many times you will here--"Trust me!  I've been there!"  So yes, we all have desires and hopes.  We all dream up things.  We all have needs.

I'm trying, however failing a lot, to be here.  The wants don't seem to go away.  I'm not even sure they're supposed to.  I'm thinking it's more of the inner peace and joy that comes when you have the wants, but you're not moved by them in any negative sort of way.  What I mean is, you don't get depressed when you are thinking, "Hmm...I'd really like that" or "How are we ever going to keep up these payments at this rate?"  or "We really should be eating ramyan noodles every day...but ugh!" or "Why did I just buy that?  We can't afford it."

I pass through my house a lot.  Duh...It's where I spend 90% of my time.  Inside these walls I daily envision what I would like to put here or put there.  I daydream creating a house with designs and color and a "look" I sometimes think will never be achieved because frankly, it costs money!  Right now I'd feel lavished if I could just go pick up new socks for you kids, or put a real set of blinds on the door-window in our bedroom instead of the old curtain we shut in the door, or  pick out a real and cute basket for our shoes instead of the laundry one we have now.  Silly things.  Luxurious things.  I imagine we have a bold-colored outdoor rug for the back deck for you kids to sit and play on, cushions to go all the way around our sitting bench, a big umbrella for shade, and hanging baskets full of colorful flowers splashing over the sides.  I'd put rockers with tables on our wonderful front porch, a table and chairs on the upstairs porch.  I'd love a sandbox in the backyard, and new carpet upstairs without any stains.  Decorative cushions on our dining room table chairs.  It's hard to live and not see things how you'd want them to be.  It's hard not living in a state of waiting...waiting for the day when you can buy those shoes or have plenty of fresh vegetables that cost too much.  The key is....can you dream and not be discontent?  That is the question.

Paul closes his statements in this passage with "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength."

Okay, so maybe I do know the key.  Paul says it's CHRIST.  Jesus is the key.  He is the secret to our contentment.  How does He become our contentment?  That is the secret you will learn if you so desire.
He will show you.  That's all I can say in this short letter.

I am not sure if we'll ever know what it is to "have plenty" although I know that by much of the world's standards, I already do have plenty.  I am not sure if we'll ever truly be "in want" as many people unfortunately experience their whole lives.  But I am sure of this: with Christ we lack nothing.

So we can de-clutter, clean out, rearrange our stuff, and start fresh with the one simple truth,

Christ satisfies every thirst and hunger we will ever have.

It's pretty much that simple, and I thank God that it is.  If only I could live this truth out more.

Love,
Mommy

"for he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things" Psalm 107:9

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