Dear Sadie,
Today was "check out" day. Whether it was the wrong thing or the right thing to do, it was the needed thing. Seriously, I felt all energy leave my body today, mental and physical, and I had to literally distract myself from you kids for awhile to muster up any mental or physical capabilities. Pizza and The Apprentice while you guys played in the living room. Taking a break for giving Titus a drink and a diaper change, I literally had to check out and let you know I was watching a show, and we could do that later. I had a little guilt, and still do, to be honest, but what's more, I didn't know what else to do. There are days when I, because I'm a mom 24/7 and I work almost every hour I am awake, just need a break. If no one else is around to help me, I just feel like I need to go to my last resorts, and rest assured that you two are going to be okay because in the end, what's a couple of hours? In the end, you two need a mom who can be recharged on emergency, however that needs to happen. I was impressed that you even went upstairs and cleaned your room like I asked you to during that time. You are amazing. I like to think I have some credit to take for your amazingness, but really I know that it's just you. Moms have to have moments when we are not on our "game" so-to-speak, and that just means we are weak. I'm not too proud to admit I am always learning. Hopefully, I will learn my way out of checking out mode, and when I get the answer, I will give it to you.
Love,
Mommy
"When I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:10
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