Day 80...Apples of Gold

Dear Sadie,

The other day I kept running things through my head over and over, without trying, that I had said earlier to family members.  Why did I say that?  Was that really true?  Should I go back and try to explain myself more--I don't think I gave them the right idea.  It was really kind of torturous when I think about it.  Getting stuck in your head like that?  Yuck.  Then I began to think, Why am I dwelling on this now?  I'm sure they have forgotten all about the conversation.  Isn't this my pride I'm talking to here?  Should it even matter what others think?  So I came to the conclusion that, no matter the cause of these cumbersome thoughts, I would have to simply let it go.  Then I felt the Lord saying something to me, in essence, and even now as I write this, Make each word count.  


In the Book of John it is stated repeatedly that Jesus only said and did what He heard and saw the Father doing.  Oh, how I long to abide in His work and rest in His ways.  I see myself nestled up against His chest so close so that I can catch every whisper, and tie my wrists to His so that I can move where His arms want to move.

The Book of Matthew says "out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.  The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good."  (12:34-5)

Words really do count for everything.  It would take me a long time to type every verse on the importance of words and the mouth.  I, unfortunately, have to just learn the hard way, over and over again, that my words really do bless and curse.  They really do matter.  Truth matters.  Honesty.  Being slow to speak.  Each word matters.  It's something I'm only beginning to grasp.  I used to think I could just say "sorry," and it would be okay.  I still think if I could just "say one more thing," then the last sentence would be rectified somehow.  But there are times when, like recently, I just know that I need to ask the Lord's help in remembering that each.word.counts.starting.now.  I can't go back and change what I've said.  I can start fresh every time I am aware, and be careful to listen to Him as I speak, and listen as He makes impressions upon my heart.  The more in tune I am to the Spirit, the more good treasure will come out, just as 12:35 says.  I love it.  It's a hard and humbling lesson to learn.  But it's a good one, and I hope to allow and work with the Spirit to show me what He's doing, and not doing....and say what He's saying...and be silent when He wants me to.

Love,
Mommy

"A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver."  Proverbs 25:11